It’s been five months since the launch of my first book, “Happiness is Over There”, (SALES PLUG) – and you can buy a signed copy at www.paperclipthinking.com or you can email me at travis@paperclipthinking.com.  Due to the time I was spending on the book project, I haven’t blogged in a year, and I’ve missed it.  No super esoteric reason for my lack of blogging, I guess I just didn’t want to force writing, so now it doesn’t feel forced and off we go…

My process for writing is predicated on having a clear mind.  If my mind is jumbled - I don’t tap into the same kind of creative vibrational energy that inspires most of my thoughts and future articles.  Simply stated – my thinking is way clearer when I don’t have a ton of shit in my head.  And… 2017 and 2018 were years that included ample amounts of good shit: starting with the launching of my coaching business; followed by the corporate consulting while attempting to keep the business open; changing the business to a publishing company (so my book could launch); securing a new job (the first of my career where I’m totally aligned and loving what I do); and doing my best to “keep it together” while all of this was spinning in my life.  I reference it as good shit, because I learned so much, and even better shit because I kept fairly peaceful through the two-year period.

The process of self-publishing was also unreal and it taught me a ton too.  Spending time editing, re-reading, and contemplating the messages from 100’s and 1000’s of journal entries that had been created over a 10-year period and then to see your words in bound print for the first time… um nom nom… it was life altering.  I was able to relive what my life was like over a decade (2008-2018) and I could see the growth and the change (how fucking cool is that)?  I was also able to garner a short list of “take aways” and I would like to share them with the world (or at least 1500 of you who might see this article after I pay $12.00-$15.00 to Facebook to boost the post that will follow this writing).

“Happiness is Over There” is a memoir style snap shot into my 10-year journey of finding solutions and new behaviors that lifted me from being anxiety ridden and depressed to peaceful and productive.  I share the story because I believe in vulnerability and dialogue (the two undertones of my life that when embraced, totally changed how I was living).  I want others to have access to this information, in case they might be in a similar spot.  Here is what I learned from 2008-2018:

1.       It’s Okay- everything that happens, every choice you make, every relationship you’re in or out of, every financial situation…it’s all going to be okay.  This is a very simple, yet profound way to view life and it has eliminated my anxiety and depression.  Believing that my life was NOT going to be okay or worst yet, up to someone else to define, is where my challenges rooted.  Most of my anxiety was self-inflicted, and that self-infliction felt so real that I began believing the illusion that life was falling apart, it wasn’t.  Everything is going to be okay and I was learning every day.

2.       Don’t wait to do – So many examples of life abruptly ending and those left living wondering what we waited for?  That visit to another country, that exploration of the soul, that relationship we wanted, that business we thought of starting, that parachuting adventure, that first book authored.  Please don’t wait…

3.       Taking a test and learning its result doesn’t define you – I carried TONS of baggage from a self-imposed belief that because I was a terrible test taker, I wasn’t going to amount to much.  And…not being a martyr, our society is pretty good and classifying someone’s future success on a series of tests.  Fuck standardized tests, I think they are the devil.  And for those who are great at them, I LOVE YOU and for those of you who aren’t great at them, I LOVE YOU, and…your work ethic and your professional alignment to the things you value about yourself will determine your peace, not your grades or your test scores.  Let go of that shit if you are holding it like I was. (holding it almost ate me alive).

4.       Be Introspective – it’s an art form, takes vulnerability, yet when done…will teach you so much.

5.       Love – be willing to love yourself and then love everyone else on the planet (even when they don’t believe in it or you).

6.       Align your actions with your words – Doing this will support clarity and this clarity will make life easier for you and for anyone else you encounter.

7.       Add value – wake each day and look to support someone in achieving what they want (as long as it is moral, ethical, and possible for you to support).  When you support them in achieving their want, it just feels good and adds value into the world.

8.       Be Curious – Ask more questions than you make statements (I’m still working on this).  If you want to understand something, go experience it, don’t lean on others to define what feels good and what doesn’t.

9.       Everything in life ties back to decisions we make – Be personally accountable for those choices.  Be willing to apologize and be willing to celebrate, yet at no time do I invite or support you with blaming anyone else for your life’s outcome.

10.   I don’t owe you shit – and you don’t owe me shit.  Entitlement is rooted in believing that someone else owes you something.  They don’t.  This was one of the most debilitating belief systems that I carried and as I’ve squashed it, life feels way more open and free.

Thanks for reading- buy my book if you want more of this topic AND…I love each of you.

Trav