I was recently introduced to a potential coachee and she asked, “is being a coach just corporate speak for being a therapist?” and then she posed a follow up question, “and...what certifies you to be a coach?” Both questions were powerful and both questions continue to inspire introspection.
No- I am not a therapist. Therapy is based in the past and I’m focused on supporting people with the present and their intentions for the future. The person who was questioning me also referenced coaching as a way to “fix” people. She shared her past experiences with coaches and these coaches were people who had been assigned by HR as a “corrective action” for a perceived faltering performance. That makes me sad- both for her and for the reputation of the coaching process. I’m not in the business of “fixing” people, because I don’t believe that anyone is broken and I won’t support coaching as a “fix it” endeavor. I believe anything we experience in life is tied back to choices we make, plain and simple. This belief is where my coaching is rooted and it is the cornerstone of how I’m coached, today. When I support people, I coach them by sharing some of the experiences I’ve had and the results from those experiences (some healthy, some not- I share it all) because sharing can transition into invitations for my coachees to consider the results I gathered and then they can make their choice regarding whether or not applying those invitations may add value to their current situation (s). Through 8 years of experience as a coachee, I’ve embraced choosing a new way to live, lead and support the people I encounter. I’ve become comfortable with Paperclip Thinking™ and I have embraced a more divergent way to create value. My energy levels are high, I’m taking care of my health (have shed 55 pounds), my discussions are more creative, my debt has gone away, income has increased and my wife and children share a deeper relationship with me than we had in the past. These are the results that I chose to achieve and the coaching process supported me, so now I’m focused on learning what others want from life and I can support them in achieving their wants, too. That’s what a coach is, from my perspective.
The second question. Am I certified? No- I’m qualified. Our society LOVES certifications, don’t we? In the past, I’ve bought into the corporate dogma that states, “because someone is certified they must be qualified” and I’m no longer buying it! When I selected my coach, it was important for me that the person was living life in a way that was inspiring to me (not whether they paid for a test and a certification) and as I sought coaching for my own reasons; embrace health, let go of fear, choose balance, experience career growth, and remain strong as a parent and husband, these were ultimately my wants and if I would have placed my wants into the hands of a coach who was certified, but not living in inspiration, creativity, innovation and growth, then it didn’t feel worth my time.
Am I certified, no. Will I ever be, no! Am I qualified, yes. Forty-four years on this planet, a wife of 19 years, 3 children, 7 jobs, 2 careers, 8 years of coaching and a laundry list of experiences and the data that comes from them. Through all of this, I’ve achieved the ability and willingness to choose peace. So...what’s a coach, you ask? A coach is someone who is passionate about sharing their experiences and offering the knowledge they’ve gained, so the coachee can benefit from a different perspective and work to achieve what they want from life. I love to coach and I couldn’t ask for a better way to add value to those I come in contact with, daily.
